Toby deleted 47 dead feature flags — all the ones set to false. The half-built features shipped to everyone.

301'd a test route as permanent instead of 302. Three months later it is still getting traffic — from itself.

Toby made the logs transparent. Literally — passwords and all, on the public status dashboard.

Nobody checked the axis before framing it. The hockey stick was the bill, not the users.

Toby just wanted to test the email flow. Production sent it to all 812,004 customers.

June skipped the autoscaling cap just for tonight. Dale called the bill a growth metric.

Toby tidied his git history. Main did not survive the tidying.

You asked the AI to review the PR. It approved it in 0.3 seconds. Production disagreed.

Muted the alerts channel for one quiet Friday night. Found out about the outage a week later.

The flaky test only failed sometimes, so we retried it until it passed. Now it passes even with the code deleted.